Easy Decisions, Hard Life. Hard Decisions, Easy Life.

Nobody tells you that trusting your intuition is scary.

On social media it gets sold as enlightenment, as if the moment you become spiritually connected enough, decisions become effortless. The right path just appears. The stars align. Mercury cooperates.

But that hasn't been my experience and I don't think it's yours either.

Here's what I've come to understand.

Trusting your intuition doesn't make decisions easy, it just makes them honest and honest decisions are often the hardest ones we'll ever make, because they ask us to let go of things we're not sure we're ready to release.

But here's the thing we get wrong about that.

It's never really the thing itself we want to keep - it's how the thing makes us feel. The belonging. The safety. The identity. The hope of what it could become.

And when we understand that, we start to understand something liberating.

That feeling? It lives inside you. Not in the thing. Which means when you let go, you don't lose the feeling forever. You just have to trust that it can be found again. In something new. In something more aligned. In something you can't see yet from where you're standing.

That's the void. And the void is terrifying.

But it's also where everything begins.

Me and James have been sitting in our own version of this lately.

We both come from traditional households. Linear paths. Grow up, get a job, save for a house, follow the blueprint and for a long time we measured ourselves against that, and always found ourselves lacking.

Our life doesn't look like other people's and it probably never will.

After twelve months of grief, loss and everything being cracked open we've stopped apologising for that and we have started asking a different question instead.

What if our life was never meant to look like theirs?

What if the blueprint was never ours to follow?

That's a hard question to sit with. But it's leading us somewhere truer than the alternative ever did.

Here's something nobody is talking about though - We are losing our ability to make intuitive decisions in ways we don't even notice, because we live in a world that offers us an easier option at every turn.

I used to make decisions by asking everyone around me - friends, family, anyone who'd listen. Not because I valued their opinion more than my own. But because I was too scared to trust myself. Too scared to be wrong. Too scared to own it if it didn't work out.

And then ChatGPT arrived.

And I thought perfect, I can do this alone now. I'm not that person anymore, crowdsourcing every decision.

But I wasn't doing it alone, I was just outsourcing to data instead of people.

I'd take a business idea, something born from feeling, from passion, from a deep internal knowing and I'd hand it to an algorithm and ask it to validate me. And it would, beautifully, with logic and it made my neurodivergent ass feel so safe.

And I'd feel better. Temporarily.

But the decision still wasn't mine. It was built on data not energy. On information not intuition. On what made sense not what felt true.

It's easy to make decisions from positive emotions. Excitement, hope, possibility - those feel safe to act from. We trust them. We give them permission.

But the real work of intuition happens in the uncomfortable emotions.

Grief. Fear. Sadness. Loss. Uncertainty.

We've been told not to make big decisions from those places. "Wait until the dust settles." "Wait until you're thinking clearly." "Wait until Mercury is direct."

But the world doesn't stop while you're grieving. Life keeps moving. Decisions still need to be made and I want to challenge that advice.

Because those uncomfortable emotions? They're not noise. They're signal. They're your body and your soul sending you the clearest message you'll ever receive - this isn't working, this isn't aligned, this isn't yours anymore.

That IS your intuition speaking, loudly, from the most honest place inside you.

The grief is the message and the fear is the data. The discomfort is the direction.

I've made some of the most important decisions of my life in the last twelve months from exactly those places. In the middle of loss. In the middle of uncertainty. In the middle of not knowing what came next.

And every single one of them has led me somewhere truer.

Not easier. Truer.

Easy decisions feel safe. They're quick, painless, data-backed, socially approved.

But they keep you exactly where you are.

Hard decisions crack you open. They lead to awkward conversations, vulnerable moments, revisiting parts of yourself you'd rather leave alone.

But they lead you home.

Easy decisions, hard life.

Hard decisions, easy life.

I'm still in the middle of mine.

Still in the void and still trusting the process even when it's uncomfortable. Still choosing the harder, truer thing over the easier, safer one.

But for the first time in a long time, I trust where it's lea

ding.

Even when I can't see it yet.

Even when it's scary.

Especially then.

If this landed, I'd love for you to stay in this world.

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